Here are some jokes. Enjoy!
Q: Why don't witches like to ride their brooms when they're angry?
A: They're afraid of flying off the handle!
Q: Who won the skeleton beauty contest?
A: No body.
Q: What do skeletons say before they begin dining?
A: Bone appetit!
Q: Where do baby ghosts go during the day?
A: Dayscare centers.
Q: Who did Frankenstein take to the prom?
A: His ghoulfriend.
Q: What monster flies his kite in a rainstorm?
A: Benjamin Frankenstein.
Q: What do ghosts serve for dessert?
A: Ice Scream.
Q: What's a monster's favorite play?
A: Romeo and Ghouliet.
Q: What do witches put on their hair?
A: Scare spray.
Q: What do you get when you cross Bambi with a ghost?
A: Bamboo.
Q: What's a haunted chicken?
A: A poultry-geist.
Q: Why did the monster eat a light bulb?
A: Because he was in need of a light snack.
Q: What kind of mistakes to spooks make?
A: Boo boos.
Q: Why couldn't Dracula's wife get to sleep?
A: Because of his coffin.
Q: Why do mummies make excellent spies?
A: They're good at keeping things under wraps.
Q: What kind of monster is safe to put in the washing machine?
A: A wash-and-wear wolf.
Q: What's the first thing ghosts do when the get into a car?
A: They boo-kle their seatbelts.
Q: What has webbed feet, feathers, fangs, and goes quack-quack?
A: Count Duckula.
Q: What do you call a person who puts poison into a person's corn flakes?
A: A cereal killer.
Q: Why wasn't there any food left after the monster party?
A: Because everyone was a goblin.
Q: How did the ghost patch his sheet?
A: With pumpkin patch.
Q: What do birds sing on Halloween?
A: Trick-or-Tweet.
Q: What did the little ghost have in his rock collection?
A: Tombstones.
Q: Why should a skeleton drink 10 glasses of milk a day?
A: It's good for the bones.
Q: Why did the witches' team lost the baseball game?
A: Their bats flew away.
Q: What is a witch's favorite subject in school?
A: Spelling.
Q: Where did the vampire open a savings account?
A: At the blood bank.
Q: Where do mummies go for a swim?
A: To the dead sea.
Q: Where does Dracula waterski?
A: On Lake Erie.
Q: What kind of boat does Dracula drive?
A: A blood vessel.
Q: What do you get when you divide the diameter of a jack-o-lantern by its circumference?
A: Pumpkin Pi.
Q: Why are there fences around cemeteries?
A: Because people are just dying to get in.
Q: Why didn't the skeleton cross the road?
A: He didn't have the
guts.
Check this out:
http://www.cutestuf.com/flash_1002/spook_stripper.cfm
Trick-or-Treat
by Zodiac Signs
(Taken
from Fantasy Fights Halloween Page)
Aries pushes the
others aside to get to the door first.
Taurus will only eat the finest of Swiss chocolates.
Gemini goes around the neighborhood once, changes costumes and goes around
again.
Cancer stays at home and gives candy to the other trick-or-treaters.
Leo plans their costume for months, then won't go out because someone else had
the same idea.
Virgo wears a neatly-pressed suit and tells everyone they're a bookkeeper.
Libra is still standing in front of the closet trying to decide on a costume.
(<----- this is
totally me!)
Scorpio isn't in it
for the candy.
Sagittarius will manage to wander to the next town.
Capricorn makes a list of all the houses that give good candy and the optimal
route to take.
Aquarius builds their
costume out of spare flashlights and spends all night tinkering when it shorts.
Pisces skips the whole thing to compose poetry to the Moon.
OK, these are a little cheesy, but they bring a bit
of fun for you!